Sketches
Sketches? You're looking for some sketches, you say? Hold on a sec, let me check around out back. (Please hum to yourself for a minute or two while I'm gone.)
Catchy tune. I've never heard anyone hum the soundtrack from a dying man's EKG machine before. Okay, today's your lucky day; we just got a new shipment of sketches in. You look like you're a size 4- maybe 5-page sketch person, emmawright? Feel free to open the boxes and see if any of them fit, but please make sure to wear these disposable socks when you do. Then leave the socks up at the counter, and I'll take them home tonight. Never you mind why.
Catchy tune. I've never heard anyone hum the soundtrack from a dying man's EKG machine before. Okay, today's your lucky day; we just got a new shipment of sketches in. You look like you're a size 4- maybe 5-page sketch person, emmawright? Feel free to open the boxes and see if any of them fit, but please make sure to wear these disposable socks when you do. Then leave the socks up at the counter, and I'll take them home tonight. Never you mind why.
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Excuse me, are you Conan O'Brien? No? Well, you really are a dead-ringer for him. Hey, hey, hey, there's no need for that type of language; I was just making an innocent observation. Pleases accept this Conan O'Brien sketch as an apology.
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In accountant-speak, creating a website this spiritually rewarding "costs a buttload." So to help us keep some of the butt costs down, would you please take a moment to read this sketch from our sponsor? And remember, here at MikeWritesFunny.com, we pass the butt savings on to you!
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It's a well-known fact that a substitute teacher is the second-most appreciated job on the planet. The most appreciated? A substitute teacher at a Community Center night class trying to find common ground with a group of students who barely speak his language.
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When a birthday clown shows up to help celebrate your young daughter's special day, a lifetime of memories can be made. And when you've hired Mr. Giggles at the last minute, all (read: none) of them are awesome.
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How many times have you been watching QVC after midnight and thought, "I wish they were selling something for me and my tummy?" Well, here's something right up your alley and down your gullet. Bon appetite!
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Everyone needs a relaxing place to help recharge their batteries. For some, it's a bustling high-rise in the big city. For others, it's a peaceful ranch on the outskirts of town. And for those special few, it's a Witness Relocationer's Vacationer's spot in parts unknown.
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Who wouldn't get caught up in the excitement when a husband and his sports-crazy buddies mix the solemnity of bleacher cheers with the wackiness of a maternity ward? Apparently, his birth-giving wife wouldn't. Go figure some people, huh?
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You've always wanted to know what "fletching" is, haven't you? Then check this sketch out to see that fletching is not some sex act that's even more degrading than watching Chevy Chase in "Fletch". Then again, what is?
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Two guys. One sidewalk. And not even four brain cells to rub together between them. Ladies and gentleman, I present to you for your slow-dining, slow-dancing, and slow-learning pleasure, The Whatever! Guys.
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For just one click now, and two clicks every other week, I can get you in on the ground floor of this revolutionary fast food/dating franchise mashup before all four Sharks on Shark Tank get into a grisly bidding war over it. But you must act now!
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Once the science catches up and this scenario becomes more common (and trust me, it will), birthing classes will be a lot less appealing to women and a lot more appealing to the type of guys who constantly say "Bro" and "Classic".
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Cliché alert: Just another sketch about a young couple renting a stranger's home sight unseen, having friends over to share the vacation of a lifetime, and inadvertently annoying a bickering dead couple who just want to watch a WrestleMania replay.
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OMGACS! (Oh My God, A Cat Sketch!) I bet that even in a humorous comedy-style sketch, the cats do funs thing like push expensive vases off a shelf and give their owners toxoplasmosis. OMGCASC! (Oh My God, Cats Are So Cute!)
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I just found 3 more sketches that you might like. They were originally written for BBC Radio, so they're styled a bit differently. But I can tell from your elegant International House Of Pancakes tee-shirt that you're the type of world-traveler who might just favour these.
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